How to eat an avocado

I was standing in my kitchen minding my own business when the phone rang. It was my mother-in-law calling me with a question.

Mother-in-law: What should I do with an avocado?

Me: *blink blink* You mean, like how do you eat one?

Mother-in-law: Yes.

Now as you read this simple exchange you might think it was obvious my mother-in-law was asking how she should prepare an avocado in order to eat it, or even possibly asking for some recipes where an avocado would be a main ingredient.

Obvious to some perhaps….but in that brief moment in time when I was standing in my kitchen I had a million other things going through my mind: work, kids, daily household tasks…etc… Notice, not one of the items on my mental to-do list had anything to do with ‘avocados’ so when she called and asked, ‘What should I do with an avocado?’ I blanked.

The question was too broad, too vague, and I started thinking about all the things you could do with an avocado…but probably shouldn’t.

If my mother-in-law had said, ‘How do I eat an avocado?’ that would have pointed me in the right direction.

The point?

As communicators, we are by nature the ones who ask the questions. We dig for answers. We compile the results.  We must always remember that sometimes how you ask the question is just as important as the information you want to gather.

Your audience (be they employees, a focus group, subject for an interview…etc…) are very busy people with a lot going on in their lives and in their heads. Make it easy for them by asking clear, concise questions so they know exactly what kind of information you need.

By the way, I was able to answer my mother-in-law’s question and as far as I know she did enjoy her avocado.

A CEO’s guide to employee communications Part II (2 of 3)

A satirical look at employee communications…

When you first started your company, the only name on the org chart was yours.  Communication was easy but it made for really lousy office parties.

But then something magical happened.  Your success spawned a dotted line under your name on the org chart…then another…and another…until you had something we in the biz like to call “employees.”

The more employees you have the more important it is to get out in front of them and communicate to them.  In part one of A CEO’s guide to employee communications, we discussed audience.  Now let’s take a look at your message. 

Message basics
There are many types of communications you can write, but for the most part the basics for any message are all the same.

Here are a few tips:

Do

• Keep it simple – Don’t try to write like someone else.  You don’t have to use $10 words to get your point across.
• Think short – Short sentences and paragraphs are easier to read and understand.
• Make it personal – Write in the first person.  Don’t be afraid to use words like I, you, and we when talking to your employees.
• Clean up your copy – If you don’t have a communication staff person, ask someone you trust to read through your piece and watch for grammar and punctuation typos.

Don’t

• Don’t use acronyms without defining them first – For example, on a first reference say, “Rapid Response Team (RRT).” After that you can use the acronym, RRT.

• Don’t go overboard with humor – A little light humor is okay just make sure it is appropriate for the tone of your message. Avoid sarcasm.

• Don’t fall into corporate speak mode – Words like execute, utilization, and paradigm shift will make your employees’ eyes glaze over.
  • Stinky Bad: By better utilizing existing resources, we will deliver on our executables.
  • Pretty Good: We will work with our venders to find new ways to give our customers what they want.
• Don’t write one message and then stop – Regular communication is important. Decide how often you will write your message (weekly, monthly, quarterly), and then stick to it.

The most important thing to remember when writing your message is to answer these two questions:

• What do your employees want to know?
• What do your employees need to know?

If your message does that, the rest is easy.

Next up in Part III …Choosing your communication vehicle: Blogs, e-mails, and newsletters! Oh my!

Hiatus

We plan and the universe laughs.

I had planned on writing part two of my CEO’s Guide to Employee Communications and I still will. Unfortunately, family drama filled my calendar before I could finalize my draft.

My husband, John, developed complications after having planned hernia surgery in January and spent most of February in the hospital or recovering at home.  Now that he is doing better, I feel like I can write about our experience.

911
Like most hospital stories, ours begins with a 911 call.  We went to the emergency room where the doctors and nurses managed John’s pain and ran tests.  It took several hours but finally our doctor had a confirmed diagnosis and a battle plan.

Our doctor should teach crisis communication.  Seriously… He was brilliant.  John’s situation required immediate attention but our doc was unflappable.  He took the time to explain what was going on and what needed to be done.  He projected the perfect balance of compassion and confidence.  He even called me at home the first night to reassure me everything was under control.

How’s your bedside manner?
All together, John was in the ICU for six days and then another seven on a regular ward.  Two weeks sitting in the hospital makes for a lot of people watching. Here’s what watching the medical staff taught me about crisis communications:

• Speak calmly.
• Listen intently.
• Act/move confidently.
• Leave your OMG moment at the door, and take your own pulse first.

Crisis Communications
When you’re dealing with a crisis, it is important to act quickly but you need a battle plan first.  A doctor wouldn’t pick up a scalpel until he knew why he was operating. It is the same in communications.  Here are a few questions you should answer as you prepare your plan:

• What does your audience need to know?
• What questions will you be asked?
• What information do you not know?
• What are you doing to solve the problem?
• When will you provide more information?
• How will you know when the crisis has passed?

You also want to quickly correct any misinformation your audience may have heard.  But most importantly, be calm and confident.  You don’t want to offer false confidence that overinflates expectations, but you can stress what your team is doing to solve the problem.

Crisis Communication: In a crisis, what you don’t say or don’t do is just as important as what you do say and do.

A CEO’s guide to employee communications Part I (1 of 3)

A satirical look at employee communications…

You’re the president of your company and you want to write regular communications to your employees.  If you are lucky, you have a communications staff person who will write or help you write your message.  But if you are a small business owner, then you might not have a communications team waiting in the wings so….what do you do?

Don’t despair! I’m going to give you a few tips to help get you through this process.

Your audience
Before you put pen to paper (or fingers to your keyboard), you first need to remember who will be reading what your write.

PRESIDENT OF COMPANY: That’s easy! I already know who I’m writing to.

ME: Not so fast, Scooter… Let me re-introduce you to your employees.

• Kool-Aid Drinkers
  • Who are they? – Happy interns, new employees, lifers who would cut off a finger before working for someone else.
  • Identifying characteristics – Exceedingly cheerful, answer every employee poll, and will always volunteer to help promote company values and services even when it requires after hours or weekends.  Wear corporate apparel every casual Friday.
  • What do they want? – To sit next to you at the company holiday party and another corporate t-shirt.

• Seasoned Vets
  • Who are they? – They’ve been around the block and have seen the good with the bad.
  • Identifying characteristics – Come with a healthy dose of skepticism. Will sometimes masquerade as Kool-Aid drinkers when politically advantageous.
  • What do they want? – A bigger 401(k) company match and more time off.

• Hopelessly Disgruntled
  • Who are they? – Skidded past skepticism and slammed headlong into full blown anger two layoffs ago.
  • Identifying characteristics –Little cloud of doom floating above their head.  Resentment rolls off them like stench from three-day-old fish. Updated resume posted on LinkedIn.
  • What do they want? – A job offer from your competition.  Don’t give them free company t-shirts – it will only enrage them.

So if knowing your audience is key to good communication, which group do you target? Shoot for the middle and write for the Seasoned Vets.

Why?

• Kool-Aid drinkers will love you no matter what you say.  You’re preaching to the converted. You could write it on a cocktail napkin and photocopy it and they’d say you were “creative.”

• The Hopelessly Disgruntled will most likely delete your message without reading it.  If they do read your message, it will only be to look for typos or for more reasons to hate your guts.  Don’t take it personally…

• Seasoned Vets will read your message and might even give you constructive feedback…that is if they’re feeling up to it.

Never forget the real reasons why you are writing a message: Getting in front of your employees regardless of which group they fall into and keeping them informed.

Next up in Part II… Your message!

Holiday disclaimer

This one is just for fun!  Happy holidays everybody!

Have an all inclusive, non-offensive, tolerant winter experience not associated with any one religion (personal belief system, convictions, or creed) or ethnic background (race or geographical) or socioeconomic group.

Under no circumstances should you feel forced or obligated to exhibit feelings contrary to your current condition if you are overwhelmed by the unhappiness of others or are experiencing anxiety due to current world events or personal instability, and wish to remain in an unaltered emotional state as it is more in keeping with your natural existence or if you are making a political or social statement.

Please forgive me if you find this unsolicited proclamation oppressive or insensitive in any way as it was not intended as such.

May this time of year also be free of the blatant exploitation of arctic wildlife (endangered or otherwise), and may we see the liberation of enslaved animals forced to live with or near their human oppressors.

May you avoid commercialism and the over consumption of material goods and foodstuffs in the next calendar year.

Everybody’s fine…but…

In my family we have a long standing tradition of delivering bad news with the phrase, “Everybody’s fine…but…”  It serves to prepare the listener that something is perhaps amiss, while at the same time immediately dispelling their darkest fears.

How did this start?  Well, it all started with a train ride.

One summer, my parents decided my sister and I should spend more time with my grandparents.  So once a week we would hop the little commuter train in Cape May Court House, N.J., and ride an hour or two to my grandparents’ house.  We’d spend the day and come back in the afternoon.

One day, our train hit a dump truck trying to beat the crossing lights.  The crash ripped open the front of the train and a conductor (I’m told) had a gash on his head but other than that everyone was fine.  All the passengers had to get off the train and hop buses or wait for relatives to come pick them up.

My dad saw the accident on the news and went to get us. He had to call my mom and tell her what happened.  Not wanting to launch into a long and terrifying story where the drama unfolds a little at a time, he decided to open with, “Katie and Sara are fine…but…”

It was a simple yet brilliant way to communicate bad news.  Mom was concerned but was immediately reassured by that single sentence.

A good tip when communicating bad news to any audience: A crisis is not the time to bury your lead.

Turkey stuffing – a cautionary tale

My dad likes turkey stuffing – a lot of turkey stuffing – and he likes it cooked inside the turkey.  Usually, we make enough stuffing to cook some inside the turkey and a smaller batch to cook separately.

One year, my dad managed to stuff all of the stuffing into the turkey.  He was quite proud of himself…until the turkey exploded.

Yup, exploded. Blew one whole side off the turkey.  You should have seen the look on my mom’s face when she opened the oven.  The turkey tasted the same but it did seem odd to carve and serve a turkey that was no longer “turkey-shape.”

BLOG READER: That’s very funny but I thought your blog was about writing and communicating and stuff like that there.  So what’s with the cooking lesson?

ME: Hang on. I’m getting to it.

The point is when you’re writing a message or communicating important information it is tempting…oh so tempting…to ram, cram, and pack as much information as possible into a single communication piece.  You must resist.

Think of your audience as that poor turkey my dad mangled.  You don’t want to ram information down their throats until their eyes bulge.  So how do you combat information overload?  Here are a few tips:

• Just the facts. What information does your audience absolutely need to know right now?  Decide what information is most critical, lead with it, and then stick to it.
• Limit your key points. I personally will try to keep messages to no more than three to five key talking points.  Anything more than five and it becomes harder for your audience to remember what you said.
• Multiple messages. If your topic is extremely detailed or complex, consider breaking it into multiple messages or use different communication vehicles.  This will also help to keep your messages short.  Your audience likes short.
• Additional resources. Provide handouts or Web sites for your audience to review on their own time.  Your main message should provide an overview.  Let your audience dive into the details later.

By following these tips, you will be able to make your information easier to remember and you will avoid glazed expressions and/or exploding heads.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy customers

I was once told…and I quote… “Happy customers are not the goal.  You need to give your clients what they need, not what they want.”

Happy customers are not the goal? Happy customers are the goal to end all goals!  If your customers aren’t happy, then…well…eventually you won’t have any customers.

The second part of the statement regarding need vs. want is valid.  Customers who are given what they need are in the long run better off then customers who are simply given what they want.

Need vs. want
A customer may be happy in the short term because you gave them what they asked for, but happiness is fleeting if what you gave them did not provide them with the results they needed.

But a customer who has been forced to take what they need over what they want isn’t always happy either.  They may grudgingly admit your approach gave them the results they needed but you may have sacrificed the relationship in the process.  It does not mean you made them happy.  And it does not mean they will come back to you for their next project either.

Eat it. It’s good for you.
There are many who approach the customer-consultant relationship with a me-vs-them mentality.  The consultant thinks, “I am the expert.  I know what is best. You should do what I say.”  And that may be true but if you’re not careful, you can come across as an arrogant, combative, know-it-all and arrogance doesn’t look good on anybody.

That approach may work in a corporate setting where all your customers are internal and have no choice but to come to you with their projects.  But be warned – the fickle finger of fate has been known to change that as well, and if you’ve earned a reputation for being difficult to work with you may lose more than your internal customers.

Happy customers are my goal
I prefer a softer, collaborative approach with my customers.  I want to build trust and give my customers what they need AND want.

I will give you my honest opinion on what I believe will give you the results you need, but I’m not going to ram it down your throat.  I won’t force you to eat your vegetables or clean your room either.

That doesn’t mean I won’t ever say ‘no’ to a customer.  I will never promise anything I do not believe I can effectively deliver.

Happy customers are and will always be the goal.  The difference is how you get there.

Know your audience

While hosting my daughter’s fourth birthday, we had the misfortune of having one of our two bathrooms out of commission. Nothing good will come from ten four-year-olds and one working bathroom – oy!

The inevitable line began to form outside of the bathroom. One little boy was waiting patiently but had a slightly concerned look on his face. I apologized to him and promised it wouldn’t be much longer and then added hopefully, “Can you hold it?”

With a look of utmost seriousness and concentration he quickly grabbed the “offending appendage” and nodded vigorously. I had to clamp my hand over my mouth and walk back into the kitchen to keep from laughing.

I had forgotten the first rule of communication, “Know your audience.”

• Four-year-olds are extremely literal
• And boys are…boys…

Nuff said…

My “amazing” pet peeve

I get a small twitch under my left eye. It happens every time I hear the word “amazing.” *twitch*

It’s really a shame because it is a perfectly good word…just overused. Words go in and out of style and right now “amazing” *twitch* is in the top five popularity-wise.

Humans are creatures of habit and the more we hear a word the more we use it. The more we use it…well…it’s a vicious cycle. I’m guilty of using it too – makes my twitch work double time.

So why should we care? What does it matter if a word is overused? Well…for starters…it diminishes the power of the word. If everything is “amazing,” *twitch* then when something truly is “amazing” *twitch* we have to use a different word to describe it. The view from the rim of the Grand Canyon is amazing *twitch*, a sale at the mall…not so much.

Take a look at these:

• “The concert was amazing!” *twitch*
• “My friend Bob always throws amazing parties!” *twitch*
• “We had the most amazing weather while we were on vacation!” *twitch*
• “The chocolate lava cake at the restaurant was amazing!” *twitch*

See what I mean?

Pardon me while I take a short break to get an ice pack for my eye…Okay, I’m back.

Let’s look at those examples again – this time with a few improvements! 

• “The concert was incredible!”
• “My friend Bob always throws the best parties!”
• “We had the most beautiful weather while we were on vacation!”

And if you’re feeling really daring, try this one on for size.

• “The chocolate lava cake at the restaurant was simply orgasmic!”

It’s time to break out the thesaurus and give “amazing” *twitch* the rest it so richly deserves. Do you have a pet peeve word?